I Wanna Kill The Nogard

Creators: Klan, ばやしぃ

Average Rating
7.9 / 10
Average Difficulty
68.3 / 100
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Needle (4) Avoidance (3) Gimmick (2) Medley (7) Boss (1) Secrets (1) Puzzle (2) Quiz (2) mostExpensive (1)


  • by NightShark115

Creator's Comments:

Shinobu [Creator]
Original medley you don't see every day. Basic idea was inspired from one stage of Crimson Needle 3.
(It's also a scam medley because I altered most of the screens so much that you might think the original is enjoyable)
Edit 1: I fixed the bug pyun mentioned.

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[1] Like
Rating: N/A       Difficulty: N/A
Jul 25, 2022

12 Reviews:

A medley game of sorts that decides to go a different way.

In general, I really like a number of the ideas in this game, but a lot of the execution was a bit all over.

Production-wise, this game does basically everything it needs you to do (short of post-game access, but that's not the biggest deal) for basic play, though some of the engine features seemed to be a bit strange.

The vast majority of the game is platforming, typically featuring new twists on extremely well known screens, which was a nice idea though a lot of them were not the most interesting. One major issue here is the screen picks were... confusing to me and despite having a clearlist from a player with a wide variety of games beaten, a lot of them just kind of ended up falling into a couple categories and seemed to have little to no relevance to nogard at all (besides picking some of his least favorite games, which is a curious approach) and basically all of the makers games. Overall, lots of highs here (especially the original content) but also just a ton of not very engaging needle. Additionally there are some bonus achievements/secrets which really just resort to even more plain old standard needle. The concept of the game had so much room to work with, and the best parts for me were the ones that made use of that, doing unexpected things.

The bosses were predominantly short interludes, which was a nice bit of variety to add in, with the exception of the final boss which was a larger, more fleshed out boss which served as a nice finale.

Overall, though I'd say there's some mixed quality, it stays consistently atleast playable, and has some great parts along the way. I'd love to see more done with the idea, as I'm a big fan of not just taking screens but reinterpreting them.

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Tagged as: Needle Medley
[3] Likes
Rating: 7.2 72       Difficulty: 67 67
Jul 30, 2022
Testplayed this, its a medley game dedicated to Nogard, with the screens taken from games that he had beaten. The screens are altered with various gimmicks to make them more interesting. Some ideas might repeat for multiple screens, but the screen picks themselves are cool. The bosses are all very easy except for fish final which is hard to read but being a dotkid makes it so you can just luck through. Overall very solid medley game that doesnt try to be a k3 clone which is always nice to see.

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Tagged as: Medley
[3] Likes
Rating: 8.0 80       Difficulty: 65 65
Jul 25, 2022
I came expecting Permanence 3 but found Sudoku 3 instead.

Ivanna kill de Nogarde is an interesting entry in the medley genre. Rather than hand-picking unique and iconic screens with slight modifications to create a cohesive and varied catalogue of fangames (I may be overselling the genre a bit), Klan chooses seemingly random screens of seemingly random games and adds the creativity and variety on his own, through a set of rather wild modifications. A "scam medley", as the author himself puts it. It's not the first time this has been done - From what I recall, "I wanna be the Permanence" and "I wanna Thank to Daburyu" would be the pioneers in the field -, but Ivanna kill de Nogarde is probably the first entry that actively attempts to be different in every screen.

The production value is... kinda weak. The visuals are often mirrored from the original game and I didn't notice many attempts to add more visual flair to the uglier screens. The same obnoxious death sound as always, sound effects are often generic or nonexistent, and gravity arrows teleport the screen into the intended direction (rather than rotating it). That is not to say that the production value is not there. There are some simple transitions between areas, a neat save effect and I like how we have a separate room for every game, with this huge portrait for the title screen, rather than just a title card. But that's about it. Some aspects of the production value even linger on the meme game side, like the modified title screens and the softcore Lucario pron transition. I am a tad harsher on production value in medley games, due to their nature as "fangame catalogues" of sorts and the amount they borrow from other games, so this is a solid negative point in my book.

The creativity is...kinda weak too. Here's the thing. The concept of a medley that goes haywire on modifying its games has infinite potential. From that angle, it's kinda sad that all we get is dotkid, cannon barrels, sideways gravity and moving spikes (synced to the Kid's jump). There are other mechanics across the game, but these four are repeated so often and with so little variety in their usage that they override everything else in my memory. Which is sad, because some of the less utilized modifiers are actually great. There are some moments of brilliancy, but I also feel a number of wasted opportunities. In terms of bosses, things are not much better. Most of them are 30 second avoidances, out of which only the very first is kiiiiinda interesting. The only exception is the last boss, which feels slow and mundane, closer in nature to what we expect of a first boss in a decent adventure game. They are particularly bad for a medley game, where bosses tend to be much more grandiose.

There's not much of a difficulty balance. Each screen does whatever it wants, both in terms of design and in terms of difficulty. That is unusual for a medley game, but not really a war crime in any capacity.

So, as you can see, Ivanna kill de Nogarde is a game with insane potential that ends up delivering a mundane result. It's not bad, just underwhelming. However, it certainly does have a good number of bad moments. Let's talk about them by talking about every screen pick in the game - under a spoiler tag, in case you don't want to.

Stage 0:

The game starts off similar to, say, I wanna Classic. The idea is to bait the player into thinking this is a generic fangame that nobody cares about, but then BAM, here's the quality glow up!
The problem is that, like I said, the quality glow up is a lot less impressive than most games that employ this strategy (Like Classic).

Stage 1:

007. GGM (Synced spikes)
GGM is a nice introduction to the way the game operates.
I hated it, but in retrospect I don't have a very rational reason to. I just hate the way save 3 plays in general.

033. GB (Gravity flippers)
The screen layout kind of foreshadows how the modifier is going to play out, which is neat.
A lot of the screen is filler and it has a "hardest jump at the end of a save" moment in save 1. We can pin the fault on the original but, come on, we are modifying the screens to this extent, we can balance this a little bit better.
Aligns work differently under sideways gravity. Namely, you can't walkoff a certain jump, which is a rather annoying surprise.
Like I said before, gravity flippers don't rotate the screen - the change is instant, with no effects. This choice doubles as being incredibly lame and incredibly annoying to follow (See: Last gravity flipper).
Finally, we begin attempting to establish that one trap as a running gag. It's not a bad trap, and it isn't even unfair - you can see it coming if you think about it. It's just that the trap is lame in general. Production value issue.

038. Kill The Guy (Nothing new) (Cannon barrels + Electric switches + Coins)
"You cannot ruin Kill the Guy, right? Right?" - Me, forgetting that Series Z exists for half a second.
I hated this too. Having to learn electricity cycles at the end of a long and precise sequence is not very fun. It's also a gigantic difficulty spike that we do not expect in stage 1. Like I said, every screen is just doing whatever it feels like.

Add one surprisingly good feedback to this screen. The author chose the good stage from Color and added a neat twist at the end. It's harmless and fun, sadly ends up being the best thing in stage 1.
The borderkills make the last jump kinda annoying, though.

053. Uhuhu 2 (Modern needle)
Klan decided to let Uhuhu 2 be just needle, but add his own spin by 'modernizing' it. I really like the idea, I feel like it's a good call to let Uhuhu be just needle.
The problem is that the difficulty balance is horrendous. Every save starts off with one or two freebie jumps followed by some Phonotaxis-tier precision needle jumps out of nowhere.
I almost forgot, save 3 is mid-air. Mid-air saves are a needle war crime. Save 3 is a needle war crime in general, the first two jumps feel awful to pull off.

096. Crimson Needle 1 (Gravity Flippers)
The idea behind this screen is to take an awful screen and make it feel fun. It kind of works, but the first gravity flipper kind of ruins the fun by often making me fall into a spike before I can even see what I'm doing.

105. Breaking Out (Trials)
- Needle trial (Dotkid): Generic needle without dotkid and then generic needle with dotkid. Copy and pasted needle from the original, with buffs on par with Kamilia 3 in (lack of) creativity and a dotkid mechanic to tone the difficulty down. Still puts more effort into modifying the screen than most medley games, but the result remains lame.
- Avoidance trial (Dotkid): Forgettable just like the needle trial. Copy and pasted Cyber from K3 (with some modifications, apparently). Looks ugly and the gameplay is just as ugly.
- Puzzle trial (Darkness): Somehow the author thought it would be a good idea to make a door puzzle in the dark. It isn't. I can't even call it a puzzle when I am forced to trial-and-error everything.
- Gimmick trial (Everything): The only noteworthy area of this stage, somehow (Hence why I saved it for last). It's a large and rather creative gimmick needle area featuring a good number of interesting mechanics. Some mechanics are a little annoying (Purple zones is the worst), but it's a matter of preference here. The difficulty balance is also fine. Why couldn't the rest of the game be like this? Pretty good area overall.
- Memorization trial (Gimmick trial): (Unlock after beating the other four). It exists. It fits the theme of the stage, and makes for a nice last challenge. However, it is a little too short to be memorable.

106. Seven Trials (Synced spikes + dotkid)
Uses the same mechanic as GGM, but in an unexpected manner, so I actually like this screen. Pretty chaotic and kinda fun.

110. Sadist (Avoidance)
It's another 30 second avoidance, basically. This one is actually pretty tough. Hardest avoidance in the game in my opinion. Why are some of the hardest parts of the game in Stage 1?

582. Disaster (BOSS)
Another 30 second avoidance. It's fun for how short it is, but do you see what I'm seeing? After the avoidance trial in Breaking Out and the survival challenge in Sadist, guess what we get? That's right, ANOTHER 30 second avoidance.
You see what I mean? Every area does whatever it feels like, completely forgetting they belong together in a single game.

Stage 2:

114. Bunnyhop (Gravity Flippers)

150. LoveTrap (Triggers)
Highlight of the game. Very inventive idea that utilizes the screen to its fullest potential. Seriously, this save is really good. Why couldn't the rest of the game be like this? (Not exactly like this, please don't copypaste this save 30 times and call it a game).

270. Noesis (Buttons)
Definitely not what I expected for Noesis. Kind of an ingineous subversion, but also kind of wasted potential. It's a fun save, I guess.

296. Magnificent Stumble (Cannon barrels)
Took an inventive needle screen and made it worse. It's a decent save, but we already had enough cannon barrels in Kill the Guy.

322. Biotope (WAYTOODANK)
The original Biotope had an interesting mechanic matched with overly easy needle, so there wasn't enough time to appreciate it.
Thus, Klan took the interesting mechanic and gave it slightly harder needle to match. It's a minor change, but I like it.

337. Zeus (Synced spikes)
Precision needle with moving spikes that are synced to your jumps. It's a new way of utilizing this mechanic, so I guess I'm not complaining about variety yet. I can't say I had fun (Save 7 comes to the mind), but it's interesting for sure.

488. Butterfly (Gravity flippers)
On one hand, it feels like a wasted opportunity to use the one screen everybody knows about when Butterfly is one of the most creative oldschool fangames out there.
On the other hand, this is way better than the Kamilia 3 version.
On a third hand, it's just gravity flippers again. Come on, can't we do better than that?
On a fourth hand, this is the best gravity flipper screen in the game, so I guess it's fine.

521. Reitengo (Nothing new) (Puzzle)
Yay it's puzzle. Fun puzzle screen. No modifiers but this screen is rich enough, we don't need a crazy modifier in every screen of the game. Nothing to complain about here.

596. FTFA (Cannon barrels + Gravity flippers)
There really isn't much we can do with cannon barrels, huh?
Actually, this screen is pretty alright, except for some instant gravity flipper shenanigans.

607. Defiant (Avoidance I guess)
How did we get from Defiant to this? I mean, I guess that is the point. It's just not a very good point because instead of generic corridor needle, you get something almost as lame.

587. Disorder (BOSS)
Literally just one attack for 30 seconds. Meh.

Stage 3:

622. 3lt@s4x9uo (Nothing new) (Deaccelerator)
It's great to see 3lt@s4x9uo in a medley game. Not many changes are needed since this game is already inventive enough. Deaccelerator is a great gimmick. Strong start for stage 3.

665. Discorder (Modern needle)
Borrows a somewhat lame screen from a floor game and adds more spice to make it more challenging and engaging. Pretty fun overall.

692. Originality (Modified quiz)

742. Bingo (Nothing new)
Another fun screen choice where not much is changed. Still adds something new to the game (cycles) and qualifies as one of the more enjoyable screens in the game.

828. Crimson Needle 3 (Dotkid)

850. TIS (Synced spikes)
Huge wasted potential. I'm sick of this gimmick. Save 2 feels like a Steak game.
TIS is a screen that would seriously benefit from the Lovetrap treatment.

923. Maze (Nothing new) (Puzzle)
Would benefit from an explanation to the way those blocks work. Confusing at first, but very fun puzzle. Makes me think of Gaze. More specifically, Gaze stage 5. It looks intimidating, but as you progress you start to realize that your options are really limited. Still, this puzzle probably requires more brain power than Gaze stage 5. Man, I miss Gaze.

950. Charr (Nothing new)
Pretty fun screen with adequate buffs to match the difficulty of the stage. Surprisingly sensible, in comparison to Stage 1.
I originally thought the align grab was a new addition, but apparently the original game requires it too, which is kind of hilarious and kind of gross (because there's no align marker in the original).
Anyway, save 2 is not very good. Getting past the align thing is the only difficult part, so everything prior to it feels like a slog.

???. Excalibur (Nothing new)
Why would you do this to me.
Surprisingly decent screen pick from Excalibur. Or rather, it's a bad screen pick that can be fixed with nerfs, which is what Klan does. This truly is a scam medley.
Do we see a pattern here? The screens without modifiers are the ones that end up being the best. This is pretty depressing, in a way.

???. Brummagem (Nothing new)
Self-promotion screen. We truly have seen everything by now.
Decently fun pair of screens. First screen is confusing, the gimmick warrants an explanation (Gravity flips when you touch certain vines, but it feels like it flips randomly if you go in blind).

648. Fish (BOSS)
Chosen on purpose because Nogard hates it.
Anyway, it's fine. Changing from Fish to Superfish halfway through was a funny idea (That I would have ignored if it weren't for the Information file, thanks). I beat a HOF avoidance in 6 attempts, horay.

Stage 4 (Original stage):

Platforming: Fun original stage that brings back the gimmicks from the modified Breaking Out. Last save is quite the challenge. Very fitting for the end of the game.
Boss: The boss is lame, plain and simple. She does not feel like the last boss in a medley game. Sure, it's a huge step up in quality from the previous bosses, but that's really not saying a lot. Fun boss, but very anticlimactic.

I feel like this might come out harsher than it is intended to be, but this feels like a Sudoku game. Not the junk that some people tag as Sudoku all the time, but the original "I wanna Kill the Sudoku" games. Everything about it gives off Sudoku vibes. The text-to-speech. The made-in-paint(?) title screen modifications. The 30 second avoidances, sometimes ripped off from the original. The confusing gimmicks that are not explained in any capacity. The joke screens. That one unfunny trap that attempts to become a running gag. 'That' stage transition. The quiz stage. The one save in TIS that plays like a Steak game. Noesis. Finishing the game off with two games that do not belong in Nogard's clear list - one made by the author, and fcking Excalibur out of all games (ft. that one switch you don't need). The out-of-place last boss. The credits made in Powerpoint. I made the connection way too many times during my playthrough to not mention it in this review. Many of these elements are not present in the actual Sudoku series, but they absolutely feel like they would fit in a sequel. This game genuinely feels like a spiritual sequel to Sudoku. Or rather, if 2doku had a sequel, I wish it was this. Wildly different in a first glance, not actively trying to be annoying, but sharing enough similarities at its core to make you think "Huh. This gameplay feels familiar somehow".

The problem is that I doubt this was the author's intent. The good news is that this means that the game can be fun if you go into it with the right mindset. The bad news is that the comparison may feel a little insulting, considering Sudoku's reputation. I recall seeing a brief discussion about this in our Discord servers. Hopefully I got my point across.

Ah, right, I almost forgot, this game has a secrets and extra content. Rating doesn't include either. The "Information" files will tell you the location of the secret crystals, but most of them are very much on your face, which I like. However, actually getting them sucks. One of them requires you to beat the 30 second Cyber without dotkid hitbox, while another is a needle save with a double invert at the end. Both are complete garbage, so I politely decline. The other secrets are not much better either (Maze is neat). The information file hints that the secrets were an afterthought, and it really shows.

In short, I wanna Kill the Nogard is an interesting medley game. The concept is very promising, the execution is very disappointing but the end result is still nice. With a few high points and a number of really low points, but still a pleasant experience overall. Would recommend at least having a look. You might end up hating it, but there is some value in at least knowing it exists.
I would also recommend that more people try to make medley like this (Not with Lucario r34, but adding their own flair to the screens they borrow). It's a seriously underexplored genre.

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Tagged as: Needle Avoidance Gimmick Medley Puzzle Quiz
[2] Likes
Rating: 6.9 69       Difficulty: 69 69
Oct 1, 2022
If you want to get a journey on your hands, play this game.

Kill The Nogard is a medley game based on Nogard's clearlist, where every screen pick has a twist added to it, which made it so much more fun than your average medley game. Also, I really like the balance in this game - I had no issues anywhere in the game (rating based on any%). Even if the game throws a puzzle screen at you, could just always check a video. The twists were also creative, sometimes even laugh worthy.

I really liked this game.

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Tagged as: Medley
[1] Like
Rating: 9.5 95       Difficulty: 70 70
Dec 22, 2022
Solid and interesting medley game that changes each screen pick in some significant way. The platforming is mostly pretty decent although there are a few questionable decisions here and there (one save in the TIS screen comes to mind). Most bosses are very short avoidances that don't overstay their welcome and are pretty reasonable to beat. The final boss is pretty solid and surprisingly easy compared to many other things in the game (I didn't even realize it was the final boss until after I beat it). I didn't go for any of the secrets because some of them seem a little unreasonable, so rating is based on normal completion. Would recommend to experienced fangamers looking for some variety.

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Tagged as: Needle Avoidance Gimmick Medley Boss Secrets Puzzle Quiz
[0] Likes
Rating: 7.0 70       Difficulty: 70 70
Aug 5, 2022