15 Reviews:
ElCochran90
*Cleared on 02/05/2023*
Rating includes extra. Difficulty rating does not include extra (which remains unchanged).
100% “Z” clear.
People unfortunately get cancer, but fangames unfortunately get TEMPEST!
This putrid pile of AIDS-infected rhinoceros’ fecal matter is the virus to my corona, the devil to my religion, the Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde to my vintage AVGN, the Meet the Spartans to my Sátántangó, the Dan Brown’s Da Vinci Code to my Joyce’s Ulysses, the Brokencyde to my Bach, and the M&M's Shell Shocked to my Ocarina of Time. It sucks harder than a vacuum, can cause PTSD and can be used as a tool for forced conversion therapy to suckness.
Absolutely everything is wrong with this humankind abomination, the one and only fangame that Ebert obviously played to not consider fangames “art”. This has to be.
Device / Diverse guy teams up with this other guy, make their homework separately under LSD influence (which can work wonders [I don’t do drugs; I’m speaking on behalf of specific film auteurs]) and vomit their hallucinations in the form of “stages”. Stage 1 is the obligated, mind-numbingly boring standard tilesets, generic traps and awful platforming. You’ll find anything new, except a woeful backtrack for getting to the first secret which involves a screen transition you must quickly react to, or you’re done.
Traps are unfair, and even when you know they’ll happen, they act at the speed of light. Previous knowledge doesn’t help a bit, especially when a platform rams your body against wall spikes at 225 MPH like a McLaren F1 LM. Some traps are cryptic, like take a route, and you’re wrong; take the other one, and you’re also wrong. The red arrows gimmick is annoying, especially when they are used also as traps having a huge size.
Dr. Mario boss is amusing but the fact it can be third-tried at worst makes it clear there is a huge difference between difficulty of bosses and platforming. Nothing appealing about this boss no matter how creative it wanted to come out.
Second stage is way worse: monochromatic metallic bs associated with the original IWBTG’s Mega-Man stage. Lots of dumb traps and “see if there’s an invisible block here”. Game gets you killed after really long saves and the location of the secret is unspeakably idiotic. Remember those walls of spikes that appear in the very first screen of IWBTG? They appear here, and in this God-forsaken save, you have to SHOOT them to make them disappear. Shoot walls of spikes. Yeah. I lost many minutes looking for fake blocks in that corridor needle and when I shot by mere accident, I was stunned at what I had done. There is also this forced red & black design which has a hellish tone to it and might have been ok-ish to explore it more. That’s a no. It’s a single screen with overtly precise triggers and save points in the middle of a fall. Why???
Now, the boss of this horrendous stage surpasses any capacity of my limited proficiency of the English language. You have this cherry in the middle, right? And there’s this gray block in which you have to be constantly on for not falling to your demise, as there’s nothing else in the screen. What to do? Jump on it like water 2 (which is freaking inconsistent for the life of me!!) and shoot it. The cherry also spawns six cherries around in set intervals. Every time you shoot at it, two big cherries go at you, which is fine because you keep moving all the time. All cool, right? No, goddamit, it’s totally not! It’s ten hits in total. Only ten, and sometimes, you can shoot it twice. But when you get to the fifth hit, now eight cherries spawn around, and they way they do so is specifically design to kill the player. The cherries occupy exactly the spot you’re in, and you cannot dodge them that easily because they go diagonally; if you jump ahead of the moving block, you’re still in the angle of the original trajectory, so screw you. If you jump back away from the block and come back to it, you don’t have enough speed to get back to it. Either way it’s game over. This boss took an absurd amount of time and it is so frustrating because it is extremely simple in design and idea, and yet they figured out the most bs way to incorporate it. The hell with this freaking boss!
Third stage, at least this will give us some variety not seen in previous stages and a new song, right? What, did you forget we’re talking about the worst fangame ever made, where Hamster! is a masterpiece compared to this? It’s default tilesets and the Mega-Man 2 theme once again. Now the gimmick is you never stop jumping and have to use your second jumps properly to land and avoid spikes in screens full of traps. You can kiss my banana sprite from Destination’s avoidance.
Then, for no reason, the film transitions to the worst copy of Kill the Guy’s inverted gravity ever, which seems to have a particular obsession with gate jumps. This stage is guaranteed to make you dizzy. The secret’s location is also very cryptic, but anyone familiar with Carnival’s Crimson will get the idea since the way it is obtained is quite uncanny. The boss is an easy first-try Bubble Bobble piece of Dodongo dung where attacks begin to get interesting by the time you kill the little mf dragon.
Fourth stage is the unholy mother of f*ckness and one of the worst experiences of my life. This fourth stage is the main cause of cancer in Japan and unfortunately spread to North America. You begin with a stage that looks like diarrhea with blood. It consists of a simple gimmick: all blocks in the room alternate between normal blocks and death blocks at a given rhythm, with some platforming being the unholiness of f***. The first screen only has spikes, the blocks appear in the second screen. With this logic, be extra careful with the second save of the first screen; it’s located right at the left of a block that begins as a death block when you hit R. This is a softlock, and I’m fairly tagging the game as such. It’s obvious, but also an easy miss if you’re under the stress of finishing the previous save and saving quickly. This is quite deep into the game, so softlocking here would be absolute pain.
Now, after this, you go with the green part of the stage. This is hell. Alighieri never envisioned something like this in all of his Circles of Hell. This green hell, more disturbing than Soylent Green (1973, watch that film) has the worst doable secret of all times: the green-spike-hell brown platform tourist ride. The number of problems with this secret is agonizingly high. Right at the first time you reach the top, the platform does not handle like it normally does in standard engines. Picture this: What do you do if there’s a sea of spikes beneath you and there’s a bunch of brown platforms ahead of you stuck in a ceiling? It’s smashing time, right? The platforms have this peculiar (and amusing) property. Not here, no uh. Here, the platforms can get you stuck in the ceiling, so if you ever think of smashing your character when the platform is at the top, it is literally you signing a contract for getting stuck on the ceiling. The maneuvering this section requires is dumbass. The entire stage, including this secret, has GB-like platforms (meaning that if you land on the platform exactly when it is over a spike in the same pixel, the collision prioritizes the spike instead of the platform). This screws up the entire freaking save. Even if you see a video of it, constructing the memory for knowing exactly at which points of the platform you have to stand for the numerous 16px spaces the platform will make you travel through is more agonizing than studying for a final test of Advanced Microeconomics (I know). Finally, when the platform reaches the end, it doesn’t take you to the 32X32 space where the Green Game Boy is, nooooooooo, it goes the opposite way on the previous block, so you have to stand on the very edge after many intricate jumps while taking care of NOT LANDING ON SPIKES EVEN IF YOU’RE ON THE F*CKING PLATFORM, go to the edge, grab it, come back to the center of the platform, backtrack this lower part of the endurance test, and take a warp rapidly, which makes you fall at the speed of light in an unannounced location of the left drop, forcing you to make a high-speed diagonal.
This secret was more painful than my first breakup!
The pain of the stage continues. You come back to the second half of the second green screen, and there are 5 corridors in total that you must climb with these awful platforms. The fourth one that goes from right to left is a nightmare, as right in the middle there is a demonically possessed jump that resembles a nerfed A-jump (diagonal up and down), except the altitude of the platform makes everything more complicated, and the maneuvering required costed me 4 hours!!! Why???? And you know what caused me the first heart attack? I passed this jump and was more than prepared for the timing of the incredibly fast last platform at the top, but please, please be careful: you will notice that the leftmost block has a ledge you can stand on. Well, for no mf reason, this entire block kills you, even if you bonk at it from below. Why? I have no idea, but you must envision this seemingly harmless block as a death block from the previous blood diarrhea section. I screamed live and hit my desk. F*** this game.
Then you enter a blue area. The makers do not even know their primary colors and tossed away yellow instead; they all look godawful anyway. This screen is smurfs’ vomit. This screen has a bloody serious collision order issue that will screw you up in many unthinkable ways. Take the instance in which you first reach the right wall of the screen. On the second ledge, there’s a block that has a spike facing right exactly above you. If you land on the block, but your 11-pixel-wide hitbox is in contact with the spike, you die. This is Boshy logic and works horrendously. So there’s this part immediately after where you must fall within a 16 pixel gap but without stepping on the spike facing left. Repeat this same stupid bs for the penultimate jump immediately after: you’re on a block with a spike facing left and another one facing down right above you. Beginner-friendly stuff, it would seem, but no, because if you step a wee bit over the spike, you die! You cannot do a strat of standing on the edge of the block without touching the spike because you will touch the spike. A moronic maneuver is required for this, either cancelling, or emulating a 9 jump and get outta there. Finally, you see a small gap and you go, “that’s a 16-pixel gap; I have two frames of opportunity”. You don’t! haven’t you learned a thing? It’s actually 13 pixels wide, so regardless of the align you have, it’s frame perfect. This collision order also caused me a lot of troubles during the second part of the save, especially when you have to reach the lower right corner of the screen to activate a platform hiding in the shadows. The block above the spike on that corner can also be a killer block like the one in the previous screen simply because it has menopause bipolar issues. Who the hell knows? Oh, did I mention there is a jumpscare at the top of the screen?
The boss...................................................................
The boss...................
The following boss is the worst fangame boss I have ever faced, and the most stupidly boring, unfair, random, downright maddening nuthouse creation I ever challenged myself to beat. This boss took me to an extreme I never imagined feeling, very different from Catastrophe’s Gumi: there was a moment in which my lack of enjoyment of the boss transformed into sadness and extreme tedium. I even sweat from the forehead a bit because I really questioned myself: “Even if I’m streaming this with my friends, why in the holy fuckness of fucking fuck am I trying to beat this?” (I tried my hardest not to swear in the whole review; this boss just begged for it though). It was hopeless and monotonous. It was fucking horsehit!!
The boss is a giant cherry bouncing on all sides of the screen and has three phases corresponding to the colors you faced in the stage before (and in the proper order, at least). Each phase has only 5 hits with around 5 seconds of invincibility frames between each hit. Every time you hit it, two things happen: it can change its direction and its speed randomly, and new normal-sized cherries invade the screen: one new for the first phase, 2 for the second phase, and 3 for the third phase. There are platforms you can use to navigate through the screens.
Ok:
-The speed the main big cherry can take is 225 MPH, which is an instagib. It is humanly unreactable, and even if you’re Ao and manage to read it, you might be in the incorrect platform and make a bounce that annihilates you. Only the leftmost and rightmost platforms work.
-The screen gets saturated really fast.
-The big cherry can take a very horizontal path, so it will take forever to get down. Climbing to reach it? That’s a no if the screen gets too crowded.
-If you shoot one of the normal cherries, many things can happen: if it’s a red one, it gets bigger; if it’s a green one, it goes faster; if it’s a blue one, it multiplies by 3. So, at the ending, you’re guaranteed to have at least 30 bouncing cherries everywhere if all your shots were flawless and hit the main target correctly.
-The borders of the screens are death zones. This will kill you more times than you think.
-The fucking ending has a trap: when you kill the boss and grab the item, all cherries respawn exactly where they were left off. This is an instagib and will kill you.
-For the aforementioned point, you have zero to no control over where the cherries might end and the trajectories they maintained, so even if you know what will happen, you can be dead from the exact moment you grab the item. I had, in total, five post-blue phase attempts ruined.
-There is a final insult, for God’s sake: I mentioned that when you kill the main cherry, all cherries freeze, disappear and maintain their current location for being reactivated once you grab the item and hurry to the warp. Well, during this freezing time, they still have hitboxes, so you were also supposed to memorize the location of at least 30 cherries before you beat the boss and ensure you have a clean path to get to the center of the screen where the item is.
Suck my delicious fruits and my giant spike!!
When I progressed, I felt like someone suddenly stopped inserting a cactus up my ass, the great suffering stopped, I threw my chanclas against the closet located in my PC room, and celebrated life, being excited for a new stage coming ahead of me, even if I knew it was shit.
Fifth stage is much more chill and reminiscent of Device (remember Device, Diverse and Tempest are interconnected). It’s a scroller section where you must outrun the limits of the screen. Few traps in this one which has me shocked. Then you get to the ending and the game goes “I Wanna Be the Fangame!” mode with the darkness gimmick of only having a slim area of visibility and you moving within it. If you get past it, it’s death. It goes back and forth as many times as Argentina’s inflation: it is volatile, but keeps getting worse. Add traps for the maker’s amusement, and it’s torture once again. For getting the secret, you need to do a specific set of things so that a particular warp at the ending works.
The visual effect of the gimmick is nauseating even if it’s uncommon: the screen moves rapidly in the direction you’re facing. If you get caught by the limits of the screen, of course you’re dead. It’s a quick secret (with traps lel) that will leave you dizzier than the spinning teacups at your nearest amusement park, if any.
Then Tempest decides to copy paste IWBTG for the nth time, making a Mecha Dragon fight that also puts you in the ordeal of a long intro consisting in jumping across platforms. The boss functions kinda the same without the yellow devil teleportation gimmick, but your own bouncing can kill you and there are instances where the dragon opens its mouth and vomits delicious fruits, some at unreasonable speeds. For my two cents, this cannot be read. RNG can also get so bad that even if you could read it, you might find yourself jumping over a wall and just when you’re at the peak of your jump, the fastest cherry alive obliterates you. The final moments of the dragon also causes many circles of cherries possible to choke to for no rational reason at all.
The sixth stage (famous for K3) is final. This is the only one I can say it has something interesting going on as the first screen is a long vertical scroller... with traps. Visual design is better than all previous stages, but the music choice is so randomly annoying, and with restarting music, you want to punch the screen. There is an obsession with 16 pixel gaps that I cannot understand, and parts where you have to go through the blocks with spikes inside them (logic = 100), so you must figure out, blindly, what the hell you died to.
After passing this section, there is this funny transition to a chaos screen where you must travel upwards as quick as possible while hearing an exaggerated song, but be prepared (or not) for fake blocks preventing you from progress with many hopeless attempts to figure out the correct route of not being stopped.
The next screen is a huge room with ironically a huge portion of unused space and doesn’t have anything that even Maze wouldn’t do much, much better.
So, how to obtain the true ending? Assuming you got all Game Boys, you get warped to the main hub and you have to, very obviously duh (?), shoot all warps that took you to all stages, six in total. You must plan it because the deaths in the hub don’t make sense either (is there something logical about this piece anaconda excrement?). If you touch a spike, everything is reset and counts as a death, but if you fall or touch any of the borders, it doesn’t count as one. Very logical, bro! The final piercing in the d*** is that the warp you shoot last must obligatorily be the one at the top and do the equivalent of an F-jump but without changing direction: passing through the gate with a 5-frame jump is a must for then getting to the top where the final Game Boy appears.
There you go: True “Z” ending clear screen.
The “Z” must definitely stand for “zorra”, which means “b**ch”, which is what you were while the game had you captive.
F*** this game.
[14] Likes
Rating includes extra. Difficulty rating does not include extra (which remains unchanged).
100% “Z” clear.
People unfortunately get cancer, but fangames unfortunately get TEMPEST!
This putrid pile of AIDS-infected rhinoceros’ fecal matter is the virus to my corona, the devil to my religion, the Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde to my vintage AVGN, the Meet the Spartans to my Sátántangó, the Dan Brown’s Da Vinci Code to my Joyce’s Ulysses, the Brokencyde to my Bach, and the M&M's Shell Shocked to my Ocarina of Time. It sucks harder than a vacuum, can cause PTSD and can be used as a tool for forced conversion therapy to suckness.
Absolutely everything is wrong with this humankind abomination, the one and only fangame that Ebert obviously played to not consider fangames “art”. This has to be.
Device / Diverse guy teams up with this other guy, make their homework separately under LSD influence (which can work wonders [I don’t do drugs; I’m speaking on behalf of specific film auteurs]) and vomit their hallucinations in the form of “stages”. Stage 1 is the obligated, mind-numbingly boring standard tilesets, generic traps and awful platforming. You’ll find anything new, except a woeful backtrack for getting to the first secret which involves a screen transition you must quickly react to, or you’re done.
Traps are unfair, and even when you know they’ll happen, they act at the speed of light. Previous knowledge doesn’t help a bit, especially when a platform rams your body against wall spikes at 225 MPH like a McLaren F1 LM. Some traps are cryptic, like take a route, and you’re wrong; take the other one, and you’re also wrong. The red arrows gimmick is annoying, especially when they are used also as traps having a huge size.
Dr. Mario boss is amusing but the fact it can be third-tried at worst makes it clear there is a huge difference between difficulty of bosses and platforming. Nothing appealing about this boss no matter how creative it wanted to come out.
Second stage is way worse: monochromatic metallic bs associated with the original IWBTG’s Mega-Man stage. Lots of dumb traps and “see if there’s an invisible block here”. Game gets you killed after really long saves and the location of the secret is unspeakably idiotic. Remember those walls of spikes that appear in the very first screen of IWBTG? They appear here, and in this God-forsaken save, you have to SHOOT them to make them disappear. Shoot walls of spikes. Yeah. I lost many minutes looking for fake blocks in that corridor needle and when I shot by mere accident, I was stunned at what I had done. There is also this forced red & black design which has a hellish tone to it and might have been ok-ish to explore it more. That’s a no. It’s a single screen with overtly precise triggers and save points in the middle of a fall. Why???
Now, the boss of this horrendous stage surpasses any capacity of my limited proficiency of the English language. You have this cherry in the middle, right? And there’s this gray block in which you have to be constantly on for not falling to your demise, as there’s nothing else in the screen. What to do? Jump on it like water 2 (which is freaking inconsistent for the life of me!!) and shoot it. The cherry also spawns six cherries around in set intervals. Every time you shoot at it, two big cherries go at you, which is fine because you keep moving all the time. All cool, right? No, goddamit, it’s totally not! It’s ten hits in total. Only ten, and sometimes, you can shoot it twice. But when you get to the fifth hit, now eight cherries spawn around, and they way they do so is specifically design to kill the player. The cherries occupy exactly the spot you’re in, and you cannot dodge them that easily because they go diagonally; if you jump ahead of the moving block, you’re still in the angle of the original trajectory, so screw you. If you jump back away from the block and come back to it, you don’t have enough speed to get back to it. Either way it’s game over. This boss took an absurd amount of time and it is so frustrating because it is extremely simple in design and idea, and yet they figured out the most bs way to incorporate it. The hell with this freaking boss!
Third stage, at least this will give us some variety not seen in previous stages and a new song, right? What, did you forget we’re talking about the worst fangame ever made, where Hamster! is a masterpiece compared to this? It’s default tilesets and the Mega-Man 2 theme once again. Now the gimmick is you never stop jumping and have to use your second jumps properly to land and avoid spikes in screens full of traps. You can kiss my banana sprite from Destination’s avoidance.
Then, for no reason, the film transitions to the worst copy of Kill the Guy’s inverted gravity ever, which seems to have a particular obsession with gate jumps. This stage is guaranteed to make you dizzy. The secret’s location is also very cryptic, but anyone familiar with Carnival’s Crimson will get the idea since the way it is obtained is quite uncanny. The boss is an easy first-try Bubble Bobble piece of Dodongo dung where attacks begin to get interesting by the time you kill the little mf dragon.
Fourth stage is the unholy mother of f*ckness and one of the worst experiences of my life. This fourth stage is the main cause of cancer in Japan and unfortunately spread to North America. You begin with a stage that looks like diarrhea with blood. It consists of a simple gimmick: all blocks in the room alternate between normal blocks and death blocks at a given rhythm, with some platforming being the unholiness of f***. The first screen only has spikes, the blocks appear in the second screen. With this logic, be extra careful with the second save of the first screen; it’s located right at the left of a block that begins as a death block when you hit R. This is a softlock, and I’m fairly tagging the game as such. It’s obvious, but also an easy miss if you’re under the stress of finishing the previous save and saving quickly. This is quite deep into the game, so softlocking here would be absolute pain.
Now, after this, you go with the green part of the stage. This is hell. Alighieri never envisioned something like this in all of his Circles of Hell. This green hell, more disturbing than Soylent Green (1973, watch that film) has the worst doable secret of all times: the green-spike-hell brown platform tourist ride. The number of problems with this secret is agonizingly high. Right at the first time you reach the top, the platform does not handle like it normally does in standard engines. Picture this: What do you do if there’s a sea of spikes beneath you and there’s a bunch of brown platforms ahead of you stuck in a ceiling? It’s smashing time, right? The platforms have this peculiar (and amusing) property. Not here, no uh. Here, the platforms can get you stuck in the ceiling, so if you ever think of smashing your character when the platform is at the top, it is literally you signing a contract for getting stuck on the ceiling. The maneuvering this section requires is dumbass. The entire stage, including this secret, has GB-like platforms (meaning that if you land on the platform exactly when it is over a spike in the same pixel, the collision prioritizes the spike instead of the platform). This screws up the entire freaking save. Even if you see a video of it, constructing the memory for knowing exactly at which points of the platform you have to stand for the numerous 16px spaces the platform will make you travel through is more agonizing than studying for a final test of Advanced Microeconomics (I know). Finally, when the platform reaches the end, it doesn’t take you to the 32X32 space where the Green Game Boy is, nooooooooo, it goes the opposite way on the previous block, so you have to stand on the very edge after many intricate jumps while taking care of NOT LANDING ON SPIKES EVEN IF YOU’RE ON THE F*CKING PLATFORM, go to the edge, grab it, come back to the center of the platform, backtrack this lower part of the endurance test, and take a warp rapidly, which makes you fall at the speed of light in an unannounced location of the left drop, forcing you to make a high-speed diagonal.
This secret was more painful than my first breakup!
The pain of the stage continues. You come back to the second half of the second green screen, and there are 5 corridors in total that you must climb with these awful platforms. The fourth one that goes from right to left is a nightmare, as right in the middle there is a demonically possessed jump that resembles a nerfed A-jump (diagonal up and down), except the altitude of the platform makes everything more complicated, and the maneuvering required costed me 4 hours!!! Why???? And you know what caused me the first heart attack? I passed this jump and was more than prepared for the timing of the incredibly fast last platform at the top, but please, please be careful: you will notice that the leftmost block has a ledge you can stand on. Well, for no mf reason, this entire block kills you, even if you bonk at it from below. Why? I have no idea, but you must envision this seemingly harmless block as a death block from the previous blood diarrhea section. I screamed live and hit my desk. F*** this game.
Then you enter a blue area. The makers do not even know their primary colors and tossed away yellow instead; they all look godawful anyway. This screen is smurfs’ vomit. This screen has a bloody serious collision order issue that will screw you up in many unthinkable ways. Take the instance in which you first reach the right wall of the screen. On the second ledge, there’s a block that has a spike facing right exactly above you. If you land on the block, but your 11-pixel-wide hitbox is in contact with the spike, you die. This is Boshy logic and works horrendously. So there’s this part immediately after where you must fall within a 16 pixel gap but without stepping on the spike facing left. Repeat this same stupid bs for the penultimate jump immediately after: you’re on a block with a spike facing left and another one facing down right above you. Beginner-friendly stuff, it would seem, but no, because if you step a wee bit over the spike, you die! You cannot do a strat of standing on the edge of the block without touching the spike because you will touch the spike. A moronic maneuver is required for this, either cancelling, or emulating a 9 jump and get outta there. Finally, you see a small gap and you go, “that’s a 16-pixel gap; I have two frames of opportunity”. You don’t! haven’t you learned a thing? It’s actually 13 pixels wide, so regardless of the align you have, it’s frame perfect. This collision order also caused me a lot of troubles during the second part of the save, especially when you have to reach the lower right corner of the screen to activate a platform hiding in the shadows. The block above the spike on that corner can also be a killer block like the one in the previous screen simply because it has menopause bipolar issues. Who the hell knows? Oh, did I mention there is a jumpscare at the top of the screen?
The boss...................................................................
The boss...................
The following boss is the worst fangame boss I have ever faced, and the most stupidly boring, unfair, random, downright maddening nuthouse creation I ever challenged myself to beat. This boss took me to an extreme I never imagined feeling, very different from Catastrophe’s Gumi: there was a moment in which my lack of enjoyment of the boss transformed into sadness and extreme tedium. I even sweat from the forehead a bit because I really questioned myself: “Even if I’m streaming this with my friends, why in the holy fuckness of fucking fuck am I trying to beat this?” (I tried my hardest not to swear in the whole review; this boss just begged for it though). It was hopeless and monotonous. It was fucking horsehit!!
The boss is a giant cherry bouncing on all sides of the screen and has three phases corresponding to the colors you faced in the stage before (and in the proper order, at least). Each phase has only 5 hits with around 5 seconds of invincibility frames between each hit. Every time you hit it, two things happen: it can change its direction and its speed randomly, and new normal-sized cherries invade the screen: one new for the first phase, 2 for the second phase, and 3 for the third phase. There are platforms you can use to navigate through the screens.
Ok:
-The speed the main big cherry can take is 225 MPH, which is an instagib. It is humanly unreactable, and even if you’re Ao and manage to read it, you might be in the incorrect platform and make a bounce that annihilates you. Only the leftmost and rightmost platforms work.
-The screen gets saturated really fast.
-The big cherry can take a very horizontal path, so it will take forever to get down. Climbing to reach it? That’s a no if the screen gets too crowded.
-If you shoot one of the normal cherries, many things can happen: if it’s a red one, it gets bigger; if it’s a green one, it goes faster; if it’s a blue one, it multiplies by 3. So, at the ending, you’re guaranteed to have at least 30 bouncing cherries everywhere if all your shots were flawless and hit the main target correctly.
-The borders of the screens are death zones. This will kill you more times than you think.
-The fucking ending has a trap: when you kill the boss and grab the item, all cherries respawn exactly where they were left off. This is an instagib and will kill you.
-For the aforementioned point, you have zero to no control over where the cherries might end and the trajectories they maintained, so even if you know what will happen, you can be dead from the exact moment you grab the item. I had, in total, five post-blue phase attempts ruined.
-There is a final insult, for God’s sake: I mentioned that when you kill the main cherry, all cherries freeze, disappear and maintain their current location for being reactivated once you grab the item and hurry to the warp. Well, during this freezing time, they still have hitboxes, so you were also supposed to memorize the location of at least 30 cherries before you beat the boss and ensure you have a clean path to get to the center of the screen where the item is.
Suck my delicious fruits and my giant spike!!
When I progressed, I felt like someone suddenly stopped inserting a cactus up my ass, the great suffering stopped, I threw my chanclas against the closet located in my PC room, and celebrated life, being excited for a new stage coming ahead of me, even if I knew it was shit.
Fifth stage is much more chill and reminiscent of Device (remember Device, Diverse and Tempest are interconnected). It’s a scroller section where you must outrun the limits of the screen. Few traps in this one which has me shocked. Then you get to the ending and the game goes “I Wanna Be the Fangame!” mode with the darkness gimmick of only having a slim area of visibility and you moving within it. If you get past it, it’s death. It goes back and forth as many times as Argentina’s inflation: it is volatile, but keeps getting worse. Add traps for the maker’s amusement, and it’s torture once again. For getting the secret, you need to do a specific set of things so that a particular warp at the ending works.
The visual effect of the gimmick is nauseating even if it’s uncommon: the screen moves rapidly in the direction you’re facing. If you get caught by the limits of the screen, of course you’re dead. It’s a quick secret (with traps lel) that will leave you dizzier than the spinning teacups at your nearest amusement park, if any.
Then Tempest decides to copy paste IWBTG for the nth time, making a Mecha Dragon fight that also puts you in the ordeal of a long intro consisting in jumping across platforms. The boss functions kinda the same without the yellow devil teleportation gimmick, but your own bouncing can kill you and there are instances where the dragon opens its mouth and vomits delicious fruits, some at unreasonable speeds. For my two cents, this cannot be read. RNG can also get so bad that even if you could read it, you might find yourself jumping over a wall and just when you’re at the peak of your jump, the fastest cherry alive obliterates you. The final moments of the dragon also causes many circles of cherries possible to choke to for no rational reason at all.
The sixth stage (famous for K3) is final. This is the only one I can say it has something interesting going on as the first screen is a long vertical scroller... with traps. Visual design is better than all previous stages, but the music choice is so randomly annoying, and with restarting music, you want to punch the screen. There is an obsession with 16 pixel gaps that I cannot understand, and parts where you have to go through the blocks with spikes inside them (logic = 100), so you must figure out, blindly, what the hell you died to.
After passing this section, there is this funny transition to a chaos screen where you must travel upwards as quick as possible while hearing an exaggerated song, but be prepared (or not) for fake blocks preventing you from progress with many hopeless attempts to figure out the correct route of not being stopped.
The next screen is a huge room with ironically a huge portion of unused space and doesn’t have anything that even Maze wouldn’t do much, much better.
So, how to obtain the true ending? Assuming you got all Game Boys, you get warped to the main hub and you have to, very obviously duh (?), shoot all warps that took you to all stages, six in total. You must plan it because the deaths in the hub don’t make sense either (is there something logical about this piece anaconda excrement?). If you touch a spike, everything is reset and counts as a death, but if you fall or touch any of the borders, it doesn’t count as one. Very logical, bro! The final piercing in the d*** is that the warp you shoot last must obligatorily be the one at the top and do the equivalent of an F-jump but without changing direction: passing through the gate with a 5-frame jump is a must for then getting to the top where the final Game Boy appears.
There you go: True “Z” ending clear screen.
The “Z” must definitely stand for “zorra”, which means “b**ch”, which is what you were while the game had you captive.
F*** this game.
Rating: 0.1 1
Difficulty: 87 87
Oct 27, 2023
misty
I beated this game finally (no secrets yet). This achievement and game is very important to me, heres some history:
So back in 2018 or so i found a video of the TAS of k3, i discovered i wanna fangames then, i always liked "hard games" mainly platformers, but these games were too hard for me, the difficulty curve was too unfriendly. I tried a lot of over 70 difficulty fangames (wanted to start from the hard stuff instead of choosing easy ones to start off), anayways i raged a lot, at that time i was a very impatient and my will and mood to complete these games died pretty quickly, anyways i was still interested in fangames, so i watched a lot of videos of other fangames, watched a lot! when i saw some interesting hard fangame i downlaoded it and tried (k2, k3, crimson, destination, rz, mmm, i was only interested in the hard stuff (what a hardheaded haha)), but i quit every game in a few minutes of playing, it seemed impossible to me, i asked myself: are these games only for very skillfull people? im that bad at playing games? am i weak? i have no determination? in fact, at that time i was very ill (and still but not that fucked up) with depression, so my self-steem was under the ground, also suffered from a lot of stress and anxiety, and clearly I was very very impatient and fell into despair easily, clearly i had a lot to work and improve on my person.
now back to the game, in 2021 i got my first notebook (always played with my sister's pc), that year i started studying programming, i was improving myself, that year i felt better, so i decided to challenge myself with a hard game (because i enjoy challengues! not only in games but in real life too), i decided it was time to complete a hard i wanna fangame, but there was a lot of options, i didnt wanted to beat the "hardest", but a game hard enough to keep me focused on completing it, i watched the k3 TAS of xwidget a lot, so i though why not to choose some game from the k3, it has a lot of screens from other games, and a screen that i was very curious about, was the tempest tower, that monocromatic colors in the spikes, the grey background which makes me think about the storm and rain (stuff that i love), i searched the game, and found a playtrough of it made by rollunk (which nows is called r@ll) i saw the game, it was very strange, i payed attention to the green, blue and then the tower screens made by Ooo, it looks so awful, so "visual challengue" yet i liked it, so i decided to beat this game.
i downloaded it and fucking started, i remember that the easy saves took me like 15-30 mins each (i was very bad! xD), but i keep playing, in a week i completed the stage 1 (created by ていく), it was hard, but not impossible how i used to see these games. this stage was ok. the first boss is fun and easy, i think it took me 1 or 2 hours.
then started to play stage 2 made by Ooo (オーオオ) it was brutal. i spended hours on the save that u have to backtrack, it took me like 2 hours or so, then i spended like 5 hours on the save that u have to do a small jump to not touch the ceiling, i just didnt know how to do it, but eventually beat it, also loved the memory save! and liked the visuals on the screen before the second boss, idk, that red background, the spikes and the tiles, i liked it. the second boss is awful, its just too unfun, very hard, its very uncomfortable to fight, but i managed to beat it, i think it took more than 3 hours. this stage was very hard for me, but satisfactory to beat and execute (excluding the boss), i like Ooo's platforming, very brutal, special and satisfactory when executing it right.
stage 3 (made by ていく): it was very easy and fun (compared to 2nd stage), i liked the gimmiks, got to the 3rd boss quickly, it was hard tho, i think it took me like +4 hours, but i remember enjoying it, was fun.
so at this point i was like: hey! its hard, but i can do it! it only takes time and patience! i was very hyped, i thought i had it, i thought in that year (2021) i would complete it! i was wrong.
stage 4 (Ooo): so heres where the difficulty curve starts to hit you in the face, like a wall, this stage was harsh, the platforming was very painful. it starts off with the red screens, the timing one was hard but very fun to me! then the green screen comes, at the end of it, before getting to the blue screen, theres a very hard jump there, it took me 6 hours to figure out how the heck i was supposed to do it. then the blue screen comes, the first save was very harsh as well, it took me like 4 hours, then the second save is easy. then the fourth boss. this is were i noticed i was wrong, i wouldnt finish tempest in that year. the fouth boss is pure RNG, and i never had any experience with hard rng bosses, that shitty apple RGB boss only lasts like 55 seconds, and boy oh boy, it took me more than fucking 50 hours to beat it (started on november of 2021 and completed and beated it on september of 2023) it was just too much, i didnt have the experience nor the skill to read RNG attacks and react properly, i played like 20 hours, and then started to take breaks, it felt impossible to beat, and sometimes returned to keep trying, the hours passed and passed, but no success. in 2022, i tried very hard, played like 20 hours more, but i was very unmotivated, i died a lot on the last attack, once u kill the apple and collect the item, theres a random attack, is harsh as the fucking reality; cold, indifferent and doesnt care about your feelings and destroying your hopes, not gonna lie, i got very nervous once i got to this last attack, and panicked a lot, died like 14 times and always died because of rushing, getting nervous or doing stupid jumps who ended in death.
this year 2023 i keep improving myself, now i dont need meds to keep my mood stable also dont need pills to sleep (i defeated insomnia and re-learned how to sleep again), improved my self-steem and a lot of things as well. so in september i decided that i cant leave this game unfinished, i had to finish what i started. surprisingly i was very good and consistent with the boss (sometimes taking a break is the best thing you can do , i mean, giving up, but not forever, momentarily, to gather strenght and try again in the future) i got to the last attack a lot of times and very
consistently (i learned a lot of dodging and improved reflexes by playiang this damn RGB apple).
on 29 september of this year i beated it, after +50 hours, my reaction? a loud: yes! but not that impactful as i thought it would be to beat the boss, this was in fact because i died so many times of rng and bad decicions that i felt like i had to beat the boss in like 20 hours instead of +50, but keeped making mistakes and not learning from them, thats why it took me so long.
anyways, once i beated this boss i knew this year i would finish the game, this boss is the hardest thing on the games for sure (obviusly made by Ooo)
stage 5: very easy stage, i liked it a lot! it was fun, specially the blue screens. got to the boss quickly, i thought like: this shitty boss is gonna be easy, i beated the fourth boss now im god, but nope, it took me over 14 hours. it was hard, mainly because you have too little tiles to move, so your movement is very limited and the hitbox (the mouth is his weak point, is hard to hit sometimes). also the attacks are RNG based, and sometimes you get walled, and the third phase you have random apples which sometimes it insta kill you (some of it have very high speed and if u are unlucky they go right where your character is making almost a garanteed death unless your reflexes are on point.) i beated the dragon yesterday, it was very unfun and frustratiang to play, really hated it. and after that went for the final stage: the tower.
stage 6 (Ooo): i was finally here. finally playing the screen i saw in k3. the needly wasnt as hard as i expected, i did the first 3 saves of the tower very fast, then today completed the other 2 saves. it was hard and not very fun to do, i have to admit it. (BUT loved the monocromatic colors and desing!!! =) , but the music feels very bad when you play it, like it sounds like an annoying sound rather than actual music haha.
then you have the screen where you have to infinite jump and dodge spikes, it was ok, did it fast.
then you came to the last section or whatever it is of the stage 6, visually the design is atrocious, it has a lot of random objects that doesnt have anything to do with the tower aesthetic, there are some really hard jumps there. but managed to beat it. then you have the last screen were you are chased by a grey apple, it was fun i guess. and then i completed it.
i finished this damn game finally, maybe in the future i will do the secrets that i didt completed, but for now, i win, it took me over 2 years and 94 hours 38 mins and 54 secs. i did it, finally, and the thing is, i learned a lot about patience, determination and being optimistic by playing hard games, like really, now i tend to be more patient and can handle situations without panicking or falling in dispair, also learned about long term gratification!!! i remember a quote "if you pay attention enough, almost everything can be your teacher", you can learn almost from everything, and certainly video games are no exception. even if maybe, these hard japanese games dont have any meaning than just being harsh and unfair, you can learn and give to it your own meaning!!! yeah it can be strange learning about an amateur game, but in fact, u can learn from almost everything, the key is in the little details.
the insteresting thing, is that, i dont feel nothing really by completing it, maybe because we always enjoy the journey more than the destination. the magic of completing goals is in the process, were you change as a person. oh, this year, i started studying philosophy xD, it is very clear right?.
Anyways now about the rathing, althoug the game is old, and a lot of people think these old games are garbage or so, i dont agree, i really like the simple aesthetics and the "generic traps", altough Ooo's platforming is very punishing, i like it, probably will complete all of his games, even if they are considered "bad", i love his platforming design. so i will give this a rathing of 8/10 even if i didnt enjoyed it too much, even if it wasnt that FUN, i mean, not every game should be "fun", games like this i think is fine to not be fun, you play these games to have a challengue right? anyways, i wanna give support to these old games. IM FREE FROM THIS THING! and finally, i can say; Im The Tempest.
[4] Likes
So back in 2018 or so i found a video of the TAS of k3, i discovered i wanna fangames then, i always liked "hard games" mainly platformers, but these games were too hard for me, the difficulty curve was too unfriendly. I tried a lot of over 70 difficulty fangames (wanted to start from the hard stuff instead of choosing easy ones to start off), anayways i raged a lot, at that time i was a very impatient and my will and mood to complete these games died pretty quickly, anyways i was still interested in fangames, so i watched a lot of videos of other fangames, watched a lot! when i saw some interesting hard fangame i downlaoded it and tried (k2, k3, crimson, destination, rz, mmm, i was only interested in the hard stuff (what a hardheaded haha)), but i quit every game in a few minutes of playing, it seemed impossible to me, i asked myself: are these games only for very skillfull people? im that bad at playing games? am i weak? i have no determination? in fact, at that time i was very ill (and still but not that fucked up) with depression, so my self-steem was under the ground, also suffered from a lot of stress and anxiety, and clearly I was very very impatient and fell into despair easily, clearly i had a lot to work and improve on my person.
now back to the game, in 2021 i got my first notebook (always played with my sister's pc), that year i started studying programming, i was improving myself, that year i felt better, so i decided to challenge myself with a hard game (because i enjoy challengues! not only in games but in real life too), i decided it was time to complete a hard i wanna fangame, but there was a lot of options, i didnt wanted to beat the "hardest", but a game hard enough to keep me focused on completing it, i watched the k3 TAS of xwidget a lot, so i though why not to choose some game from the k3, it has a lot of screens from other games, and a screen that i was very curious about, was the tempest tower, that monocromatic colors in the spikes, the grey background which makes me think about the storm and rain (stuff that i love), i searched the game, and found a playtrough of it made by rollunk (which nows is called r@ll) i saw the game, it was very strange, i payed attention to the green, blue and then the tower screens made by Ooo, it looks so awful, so "visual challengue" yet i liked it, so i decided to beat this game.
i downloaded it and fucking started, i remember that the easy saves took me like 15-30 mins each (i was very bad! xD), but i keep playing, in a week i completed the stage 1 (created by ていく), it was hard, but not impossible how i used to see these games. this stage was ok. the first boss is fun and easy, i think it took me 1 or 2 hours.
then started to play stage 2 made by Ooo (オーオオ) it was brutal. i spended hours on the save that u have to backtrack, it took me like 2 hours or so, then i spended like 5 hours on the save that u have to do a small jump to not touch the ceiling, i just didnt know how to do it, but eventually beat it, also loved the memory save! and liked the visuals on the screen before the second boss, idk, that red background, the spikes and the tiles, i liked it. the second boss is awful, its just too unfun, very hard, its very uncomfortable to fight, but i managed to beat it, i think it took more than 3 hours. this stage was very hard for me, but satisfactory to beat and execute (excluding the boss), i like Ooo's platforming, very brutal, special and satisfactory when executing it right.
stage 3 (made by ていく): it was very easy and fun (compared to 2nd stage), i liked the gimmiks, got to the 3rd boss quickly, it was hard tho, i think it took me like +4 hours, but i remember enjoying it, was fun.
so at this point i was like: hey! its hard, but i can do it! it only takes time and patience! i was very hyped, i thought i had it, i thought in that year (2021) i would complete it! i was wrong.
stage 4 (Ooo): so heres where the difficulty curve starts to hit you in the face, like a wall, this stage was harsh, the platforming was very painful. it starts off with the red screens, the timing one was hard but very fun to me! then the green screen comes, at the end of it, before getting to the blue screen, theres a very hard jump there, it took me 6 hours to figure out how the heck i was supposed to do it. then the blue screen comes, the first save was very harsh as well, it took me like 4 hours, then the second save is easy. then the fourth boss. this is were i noticed i was wrong, i wouldnt finish tempest in that year. the fouth boss is pure RNG, and i never had any experience with hard rng bosses, that shitty apple RGB boss only lasts like 55 seconds, and boy oh boy, it took me more than fucking 50 hours to beat it (started on november of 2021 and completed and beated it on september of 2023) it was just too much, i didnt have the experience nor the skill to read RNG attacks and react properly, i played like 20 hours, and then started to take breaks, it felt impossible to beat, and sometimes returned to keep trying, the hours passed and passed, but no success. in 2022, i tried very hard, played like 20 hours more, but i was very unmotivated, i died a lot on the last attack, once u kill the apple and collect the item, theres a random attack, is harsh as the fucking reality; cold, indifferent and doesnt care about your feelings and destroying your hopes, not gonna lie, i got very nervous once i got to this last attack, and panicked a lot, died like 14 times and always died because of rushing, getting nervous or doing stupid jumps who ended in death.
this year 2023 i keep improving myself, now i dont need meds to keep my mood stable also dont need pills to sleep (i defeated insomnia and re-learned how to sleep again), improved my self-steem and a lot of things as well. so in september i decided that i cant leave this game unfinished, i had to finish what i started. surprisingly i was very good and consistent with the boss (sometimes taking a break is the best thing you can do , i mean, giving up, but not forever, momentarily, to gather strenght and try again in the future) i got to the last attack a lot of times and very
consistently (i learned a lot of dodging and improved reflexes by playiang this damn RGB apple).
on 29 september of this year i beated it, after +50 hours, my reaction? a loud: yes! but not that impactful as i thought it would be to beat the boss, this was in fact because i died so many times of rng and bad decicions that i felt like i had to beat the boss in like 20 hours instead of +50, but keeped making mistakes and not learning from them, thats why it took me so long.
anyways, once i beated this boss i knew this year i would finish the game, this boss is the hardest thing on the games for sure (obviusly made by Ooo)
stage 5: very easy stage, i liked it a lot! it was fun, specially the blue screens. got to the boss quickly, i thought like: this shitty boss is gonna be easy, i beated the fourth boss now im god, but nope, it took me over 14 hours. it was hard, mainly because you have too little tiles to move, so your movement is very limited and the hitbox (the mouth is his weak point, is hard to hit sometimes). also the attacks are RNG based, and sometimes you get walled, and the third phase you have random apples which sometimes it insta kill you (some of it have very high speed and if u are unlucky they go right where your character is making almost a garanteed death unless your reflexes are on point.) i beated the dragon yesterday, it was very unfun and frustratiang to play, really hated it. and after that went for the final stage: the tower.
stage 6 (Ooo): i was finally here. finally playing the screen i saw in k3. the needly wasnt as hard as i expected, i did the first 3 saves of the tower very fast, then today completed the other 2 saves. it was hard and not very fun to do, i have to admit it. (BUT loved the monocromatic colors and desing!!! =) , but the music feels very bad when you play it, like it sounds like an annoying sound rather than actual music haha.
then you have the screen where you have to infinite jump and dodge spikes, it was ok, did it fast.
then you came to the last section or whatever it is of the stage 6, visually the design is atrocious, it has a lot of random objects that doesnt have anything to do with the tower aesthetic, there are some really hard jumps there. but managed to beat it. then you have the last screen were you are chased by a grey apple, it was fun i guess. and then i completed it.
i finished this damn game finally, maybe in the future i will do the secrets that i didt completed, but for now, i win, it took me over 2 years and 94 hours 38 mins and 54 secs. i did it, finally, and the thing is, i learned a lot about patience, determination and being optimistic by playing hard games, like really, now i tend to be more patient and can handle situations without panicking or falling in dispair, also learned about long term gratification!!! i remember a quote "if you pay attention enough, almost everything can be your teacher", you can learn almost from everything, and certainly video games are no exception. even if maybe, these hard japanese games dont have any meaning than just being harsh and unfair, you can learn and give to it your own meaning!!! yeah it can be strange learning about an amateur game, but in fact, u can learn from almost everything, the key is in the little details.
the insteresting thing, is that, i dont feel nothing really by completing it, maybe because we always enjoy the journey more than the destination. the magic of completing goals is in the process, were you change as a person. oh, this year, i started studying philosophy xD, it is very clear right?.
Anyways now about the rathing, althoug the game is old, and a lot of people think these old games are garbage or so, i dont agree, i really like the simple aesthetics and the "generic traps", altough Ooo's platforming is very punishing, i like it, probably will complete all of his games, even if they are considered "bad", i love his platforming design. so i will give this a rathing of 8/10 even if i didnt enjoyed it too much, even if it wasnt that FUN, i mean, not every game should be "fun", games like this i think is fine to not be fun, you play these games to have a challengue right? anyways, i wanna give support to these old games. IM FREE FROM THIS THING! and finally, i can say; Im The Tempest.
Rating: 8.0 80
Difficulty: 79 79
Oct 15, 2023
LastTISisLife
Based on 100 % clear
Omg, this game is fucking crazy from all sides, not joking. One of the games that you cleared and you still can't believe in this fact, because how much stress and bullshit you surpass. But, hey, not everything too bad, you see i even didn't rate this zero of something. So let's go deeply here and examinate this motherfucker of videogame
The game is classic adventure, divided by 6 stages, that you must do in linear order. There's main hub that contains all 6 main ways, but they will be unlocked after you progress through previous stage. There's also 6 secret items, that are located on each stage (1 per stage obviously). Actually i must say, out of all old adventures, i think this is the best secrets content and placements i've seen. Not joking at all. I will speak about some secrets later, but in general they are placed interestingly, hard to find them blindly, but since there is NO NEED to rebeating bosses (i checked, yeah), even if you miss something, shouldn't be that bad
Okay, let's go for stages directly. First stage and first boss are pretty decent, nothing too harsh, generic tileset, but saves are quite fun and boss is pretty nice, aside of kinda bullshit 3rd phase. Second stage is kinda more rough on edges, but still platforming is alright for the most part. Can't say this about second boss tho...
Game actually brings the worst point right here. Second boss, Red fucking Apple, is really dogshit fight. It's basically sort of pattern implemented in boss, you will need to strike apple 10 times, and if first 5 hits are quite easy, last 5 hits will be A-b-o-m-i-n-a-t-i-o-n. Layout of fight is moving in circle water block, which doesn't let you double jump from it, and also it's some fucking water that loves to steal your jumps anyways. Pattern in second half will block you really hard for the most part, and hey, did i mention that every shot will provoke aiming apple at you? This is how this fight will go, and let me tell you - it's so bad, you just need to see it yourself. But more wisely, don't try to see at all and just stay away
After this cursed thing, third stage will happen, that is based on Crimson gravity switches. Pretty easy stage, surprisingly, and boss of this stage will also be piece of cake in comparison to second one. Then it will be fourth stage. So for the most part, i think this stage is best platforming in the game, most of the saves are really interesting to do, they are mostly about moving platforms and cycles - fun stuff. Infamous secret of this stage is really long classic ride on the platform, i actually quite enjoyed it a lot aside of one jump at the beginning. But man, one fucking save ruins everything. Save after secret is SO FUCKING BAD, lol. It's the reason why i set difficulty so high, i spent 2 hours on this shit and it was very miserable experience. Easy first half following by insanely precise and hard second half, mmmm, what a delicious thing. No, dumbass, it's just absurdly dumb clown-fiesta
Once you past this stage, there will be another very hard boss. This boss is... also miserable, lol. It's basically luck-based bounce check for 90 % of time, even tho some skill will teoretically help you here. Like there's no even what i can say also about it, it's just that fucking straight and bad. Oh wait, no, there's also pretty cruel twist at the end of the fight, hope you will not die to it!
Anyways, fifth stage is pretty chill and fun needle, secret here is very enjoyable and probably awards price of being the best platforming save in the game - really cool gimmick and execution. Fifth boss, well it's not that bad as fourth one, but it's still kinda sucks. It's not that about luck, even tho phase 3 will be bullshit, i actually quite enjoyed my time here, but this boss is for sure has giant troubles
Final stage arrives, woohoo. Infamous K3 tileset and a lot of fun platforming, tbh, aside of one save that requires absolutely unintuitive and precise dumb jump all of sudden. Can't really help you with strats here, i don't even know is it valign-depended or what, just jump-jump and pray i guess. Rest of the stage as i say is pretty fun, somewhat of Charr/Noesis-type of platforming. Last boss aka chase is not that hard and it's quite sweet and fun, i had some good short time
Any% ends here, but if you madman you will need to do one final thing - obtain last secret item (yeah, i lied, there is seventh) in hub. Actually, cool idea and it feels SO GOOD to destroy this warps, lol. Pretty great ending to the game, ngl
What a journey it was i must say. While nothing really stops me, i had so many troubles still through playthrough, definitely one kind of overcoming. This game definitely has some highlights and overall i think i disagree with this being like unforgivable mess, but some spots in this game are for sure very fucking bad and i can't redeem them. Be careful, if you wanna play this, and good luck for ones who will actually try. I will just rest, i hope i told everything that need to be sayed about this strange and insane fangame
[3] Likes
Omg, this game is fucking crazy from all sides, not joking. One of the games that you cleared and you still can't believe in this fact, because how much stress and bullshit you surpass. But, hey, not everything too bad, you see i even didn't rate this zero of something. So let's go deeply here and examinate this motherfucker of videogame
The game is classic adventure, divided by 6 stages, that you must do in linear order. There's main hub that contains all 6 main ways, but they will be unlocked after you progress through previous stage. There's also 6 secret items, that are located on each stage (1 per stage obviously). Actually i must say, out of all old adventures, i think this is the best secrets content and placements i've seen. Not joking at all. I will speak about some secrets later, but in general they are placed interestingly, hard to find them blindly, but since there is NO NEED to rebeating bosses (i checked, yeah), even if you miss something, shouldn't be that bad
Okay, let's go for stages directly. First stage and first boss are pretty decent, nothing too harsh, generic tileset, but saves are quite fun and boss is pretty nice, aside of kinda bullshit 3rd phase. Second stage is kinda more rough on edges, but still platforming is alright for the most part. Can't say this about second boss tho...
Game actually brings the worst point right here. Second boss, Red fucking Apple, is really dogshit fight. It's basically sort of pattern implemented in boss, you will need to strike apple 10 times, and if first 5 hits are quite easy, last 5 hits will be A-b-o-m-i-n-a-t-i-o-n. Layout of fight is moving in circle water block, which doesn't let you double jump from it, and also it's some fucking water that loves to steal your jumps anyways. Pattern in second half will block you really hard for the most part, and hey, did i mention that every shot will provoke aiming apple at you? This is how this fight will go, and let me tell you - it's so bad, you just need to see it yourself. But more wisely, don't try to see at all and just stay away
After this cursed thing, third stage will happen, that is based on Crimson gravity switches. Pretty easy stage, surprisingly, and boss of this stage will also be piece of cake in comparison to second one. Then it will be fourth stage. So for the most part, i think this stage is best platforming in the game, most of the saves are really interesting to do, they are mostly about moving platforms and cycles - fun stuff. Infamous secret of this stage is really long classic ride on the platform, i actually quite enjoyed it a lot aside of one jump at the beginning. But man, one fucking save ruins everything. Save after secret is SO FUCKING BAD, lol. It's the reason why i set difficulty so high, i spent 2 hours on this shit and it was very miserable experience. Easy first half following by insanely precise and hard second half, mmmm, what a delicious thing. No, dumbass, it's just absurdly dumb clown-fiesta
Once you past this stage, there will be another very hard boss. This boss is... also miserable, lol. It's basically luck-based bounce check for 90 % of time, even tho some skill will teoretically help you here. Like there's no even what i can say also about it, it's just that fucking straight and bad. Oh wait, no, there's also pretty cruel twist at the end of the fight, hope you will not die to it!
Anyways, fifth stage is pretty chill and fun needle, secret here is very enjoyable and probably awards price of being the best platforming save in the game - really cool gimmick and execution. Fifth boss, well it's not that bad as fourth one, but it's still kinda sucks. It's not that about luck, even tho phase 3 will be bullshit, i actually quite enjoyed my time here, but this boss is for sure has giant troubles
Final stage arrives, woohoo. Infamous K3 tileset and a lot of fun platforming, tbh, aside of one save that requires absolutely unintuitive and precise dumb jump all of sudden. Can't really help you with strats here, i don't even know is it valign-depended or what, just jump-jump and pray i guess. Rest of the stage as i say is pretty fun, somewhat of Charr/Noesis-type of platforming. Last boss aka chase is not that hard and it's quite sweet and fun, i had some good short time
Any% ends here, but if you madman you will need to do one final thing - obtain last secret item (yeah, i lied, there is seventh) in hub. Actually, cool idea and it feels SO GOOD to destroy this warps, lol. Pretty great ending to the game, ngl
What a journey it was i must say. While nothing really stops me, i had so many troubles still through playthrough, definitely one kind of overcoming. This game definitely has some highlights and overall i think i disagree with this being like unforgivable mess, but some spots in this game are for sure very fucking bad and i can't redeem them. Be careful, if you wanna play this, and good luck for ones who will actually try. I will just rest, i hope i told everything that need to be sayed about this strange and insane fangame
Rating: 4.4 44
Difficulty: 81 81
Aug 17, 2023
PlutoTheThing
This review is based on a 100% clear
Tempest is a game which is sort of all over the place, and that might be one of the main appeals of it honestly. The stages are relatively standard, it's mostly just old-school trap stuff but there's a few things to spice it up, particularly in the secrets. The traps are okay, there's definitely games with far more annoying ones but the game largely relies on flying spike traps which aren't even particularly interesting, save for a few sprinkled throughout. The bosses are odd, the main ones that stand out are boss 2 which is pretty enjoyable to play despite being a little goofy, boss 4 which was the most fun thing in the game for me, it's basically just gambling for good RNG but there's a decent skill element and I liked it, and boss 5 which was awful, I hated it a lot and it was definitely the weakest part of the game for me. The ending is also rather anticlimactic, mostly just having some pretty simple platforming which isn't very noteworthy (unless being in K3 counts as noteworthy :P)
Tempest is a fine game, I lean towards disliking it but it's respectable for the things it tries to do and how unusual it is at times. There's definitely some appeal here but I wish it was executed better in a lot of places.
[2] Likes
Tempest is a game which is sort of all over the place, and that might be one of the main appeals of it honestly. The stages are relatively standard, it's mostly just old-school trap stuff but there's a few things to spice it up, particularly in the secrets. The traps are okay, there's definitely games with far more annoying ones but the game largely relies on flying spike traps which aren't even particularly interesting, save for a few sprinkled throughout. The bosses are odd, the main ones that stand out are boss 2 which is pretty enjoyable to play despite being a little goofy, boss 4 which was the most fun thing in the game for me, it's basically just gambling for good RNG but there's a decent skill element and I liked it, and boss 5 which was awful, I hated it a lot and it was definitely the weakest part of the game for me. The ending is also rather anticlimactic, mostly just having some pretty simple platforming which isn't very noteworthy (unless being in K3 counts as noteworthy :P)
Tempest is a fine game, I lean towards disliking it but it's respectable for the things it tries to do and how unusual it is at times. There's definitely some appeal here but I wish it was executed better in a lot of places.
Rating: 4.3 43
Difficulty: 63 63
Mar 4, 2024